Thursday, April 07, 2005


Today I was up at dawn (that's a first in about a hundred years!) and out into the cherry orchard with Oscar The Blue Cat as the light crept tentatively over the mountain. Listening to the baroque trills and swoops of the dawn chorus accompanied by a woodpecker - his drumming like the throw of the tabla player's fingers - and digesting our meeting yesterday with Yves, I got to thinking about prosperity.

The visit to the canosmose atelier was like being invited into a dance of Yin. Not quite sure where we were going or how we were going to get there, we found ourselves nevertheless caught up in waves of movement as he choreographed us through tadelakt bowls, breathing pipes and luminous finishes. However, I felt slightly seasick at times, and was glad of something to hold on to with his very yang partner who was able to answer simple questions such as "What is the next step?" and "When shall we meet?" with simple answers. Christophe seems an essential part of the mix and it is a great comfort to know that he is there.

"Let us approach this in a spirit of prosperity rather than fear" Yves said as we were leaving. Once more I felt the expansion and the trust I have been feeling in everything ever since we committed to this project.

Julian and I have had many challenges concerning prosperity:

Coming from a catholic background Julian recently understood something profound about his attitude to money; that it was married to guilt and thus he felt compelled to give it away. And give it away he did, mostly to the stock-market. The realization changed him profoundly and has liberated him not only to be more responsible for what prosperity he has, but to generate more.

I tend towards the opposite. When I lived on my own I felt quite balanced about my attitude to money, and friends often commented on how free I was about it's comings and goings. However, standing side by side with someone who was the other extreme, I discovered a tension within not unlike a steel reinforced concrete floor, and a realization (not very comfortable) that money had become a symbol of my need to control and my lack of trust.

When Julian made a shift I was able to make one too, and now, though we still have a way to go, the natural in and out breath of prosperity begins to flow between us rather than grasping and losing.

"Does Yves know we only have twenty euros to spend?" Julian joked as we drove away....

In what seems like another life-time, along with 'Women Who Love Too Much' 'Women Who Drink Too Much' 'Women From Outer Space', 'My Mother, My Wallet' etc, I read a good deal about creating prosperity, but it often seemed to be just another ego based way of trying to get rich; all about me, me, me. The bio-dynamic house renovation will cost a lot of money. However, I feel that, as Kahlil Gibran speaks about children in 'The Prophet', it is not ours to grasp, it passes through our hands, and on; on to another pair of hands that love the mountain. Somehow I trust that the income and outgoings needed will be connected not just to our bank accounts (egos) but to the great tides of nature, and that we will find a way to take care of it.

And to prove it, since we committed to working with Yves and canosmose Julian has sold sixteen small paintingsand received three commissions, andZinnia made me a blog goddess!



Blogger Zinnia Cyclamen said...

Well, I'm afraid the position of blog goddess is an honorary one that doesn't actually carry any remuneration - but I'm glad it feels like part of your prosperity!

3:54 PM  
Anonymous jane said...

nice blog. reminds me of a handel aria i once played with you

12:43 AM  
Blogger ruth said...

ooooh those were the days jane....

12:44 AM  

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